Things not to say when talking to one of your lecturers and they mention their child-folk: “Oh, you have kids? I didn’t think lecturers had kids because of their hectic lifestyle.”
Not my proudest moment.
This is a perfect example of why I should have coffee before I have any conversation # BaldManProblems
Today my manager told me to stop flirting with the customers on the floor and help with the queue of customers who were waiting to pay.
I’ve never realised how much I flirted until I was pulled up on it. # BaldManProblems
I was situated at the back of bus as I went into college. A young man with a paper sat down beside me a few stops in. He was reading away and I was lost in my own world listening to music. Unbeknownst to me I stared stroking the paper with my index finger. I only realised I was at this when he ruffled his paper and cleared his vocal tract and I was forced to break away from my world, look down, and notice the ink smudge on the tip of my finger. # BaldManTravelProblems
So I just saw a man drinking a can whilst peeing at a urinal. This has to be counter productive.
I know it’s not my problem. I just wish I could have informed him that he may as well have waited until he finished his can before emptying his bladder. # BaldManProblems
There’s a stillness in the air as I go to the bathroom to have my first wee of the day. As I stand there emptying my bladder I start giggling to myself because of joke that has just popped into my head. I’m still laughing when I return to sitting room. I feel like Sarah should know about it.
Me: “Hey, Sarah!”
She doesn’t hear me because she’s engrossed in a TV show that has teenagers being portrayed by actors who are well into their twenties.
Sarah: “What is it?”
Me: “Wanna hear a joke?”
Sarah: “Eh, OK.”
Me: “What is Simon and Garfunkel’s favourite things to buy in the shop?”
Sarah: “I don’t know.”
Me: Parsley, sage, rosemary, and thyme!”
Sarah: “I don’t get it.”
Me: “Come on!”
This isn’t the first time that the punchline has gone over her head. # BaldManProblems
I was sitting down in the library and needed to check my timetable that I kept in my pocket. Now, rather than standing up to take it out I just sat there with my left hand deep in my pocket making aggravated groans as I rummaged around and tried to reach it. To the people around me I must have looked like I was trying educate my trouser snake in the library but I was really just searching for my timetable.
I think next time I’ll have to stand up to avoid suspicion. And I thought college was all about accepting the differences of others. # BaldManProblems.
I can’t prove it yet but I’m convinced one of my lecturer’s is a Sith Lord. Yesterday, in front of a gathering of students in one of the theatres he said, and I quote: “You’ll grow to hate me but that’s OK because hate makes me stronger.”
Looks like getting a degree has become more treacherous than I had previously imagined. # BaldManProblems